Sunday, February 8, 2009

im soooooo due for anor holiday.

it's already feb. til now im x able to r have any breakaway, not even able to plan one. sedih! since i decided to stay home and try to breed, this actually has limit me from planning any vacation. arggh!!!!!! how i wish i can do watever i wanna do without worrying about losing vitamin "c". :( usually in the beginning of the year im all set for my coming trips. like last year, as early as Jan, im already on my way to jakarta then bandung then jakarta again. and i dunt have to wait dat much longer cause by april, im back in bandung. then mid yr, bangkok then end of yr flew to s'pore. arghhhhh.. i missed this abilities to plan my own trip. im sooooooo hopeless now. :(

i wanna go bali again.. i wanna go redang. then to london-durham-dublin-italy in june.. mampukah i?????? i dunt think hubby wud actually entertain me on this matter. mana nak cark duit xtra ni? shud bake more n snaps more photos to materialized all this. the Almighty, i know that ur listening and i know i have to work on it before u can grant me all these. i wud.. i wud.. insya Allah

well, it's hard to adjust myself by relying on my hubby solely. it's unfair.. im sorry dear. i knew that u've been working ur ass hard just to feed both of us. tq for taking care our bills and even to fulfill my desire when im not in the position to beg pun. sian u... im grateful to the Almighty for His kindness. im really thankful...

things been changed since papa left. its hard to write it down. but yes.. since papa left things were never the same again. so many things have to be changed. im adjusting to it and trying to adapt as much as i cud. but there were times when u just wanna breakdown and cry. but one i know for sure, papa memang dah tiada. Allah lebih menyayanginya...

the last moment that i spent wit beloved papa. this was taken the night he said goodbye. May he rest in Jannah. amin..

who am i to question the Almighty decision? Sedangkan yang Maha Pemurah itu telah pun meminjamkan i his creature utk kebahagian i selama ni. Daripada Allah kita datang dan kepada Dia juga kita kembali. Redha is the words. Percaya pada qada' dan qadar, rukun iman yg harus dipegang.

At this point of life, im once again grateful to Yg Maha Esa for giving me the best things in life. My hubby, my pillar of strength. who've been there thru thick and thin. how do i ever pay u b? im officially indebted to u. love u...

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